Nowadays, wherever you look there are numerous articles, books and websites devoted to the Law of Attraction. People want to know how to apply the law and draw to themselves everything they desire. And according to books like The Secret by Rhonda Byrne and Money and the Law of Attraction by Esther and Jerry Hicks this is something everyone can do.

If everyone can do it, how come more people aren’t? Or let’s get personal—how come you’re not? Actually, you are using it. Just not in the way you hoped. Because the Law is always working whether we consciously use it or not.

There are many facets to the Law of Attraction. You’re probably aware of most of them. You have to:

1. Know what you want.
2. Be in complete alignment with that.
3. Focus on what you want.
4. Let go.

Sounds easy, right? Not exactly. It’s simple but not easy.

For one thing, how many people really know what they want? And if they do, can they narrow it down to one thing. And are you supposed to want money or what money can bring you? What if you want a lot of things? Then what do you do?

Suppose you know what you want. How do you know you’re in complete alignment? This one is easy. If you don’t already have it then you’re not in alignment! So then, how do you get in alignment if you don’t know how you’re out of alignment?

That one is a little more challenging. If you don’t have something you want, then somewhere inside you, probably on an unconscious (meaning out of your awareness) level you have conflicting feelings about having it. For instance, many people say they want more money but if you ask them what they think about having more money, they will often say things like: “If I have more money, then people will constantly hit me up for loans” or “More money means more work”. With comments like these it’s easy to see why they haven’t manifested more money.

Those comments are what we call “Limiting Beliefs” and we hold these deep inside where they basically drive our behavior without our awareness. And all the exercises that tell you to write out your beliefs, why you have them and then write out the opposite belief don’t actually work because these beliefs are held in our brains as neuro-pathways. You might say we become hard wired to actualize them so just repeating another belief has shown to actually backfire and can cause more contradictory thoughts.

What about focusing on what you want? Well, obviously if you don’t know exactly what you want that’s a problem. If you do know but still aren’t manifesting, it probably means you’re focusing on what you don’t want rather than what you do want.

This is a challenge sometimes when our external reality is not what we want. How do you focus on having a dream house when you have trouble making the mortgage or rent payment? Or having the body you always wanted when you look in the mirror and only see the weight you need to lose? Or maybe you want to be in a loving relationship but everyone you go out with is less than desirable?

If everywhere you look you see the things you don’t want it can be hard to focus on the desired result with all that staring you in the face!

This brings us to Letting Go. If your external reality is so far from your desired reality, you may find it difficult to not get desperate about it. And desperation just attracts more things and situations to be desperate about.

Sometimes too, you may also be dealing with past experiences of trying to use the Law of Attraction and only having it work a little. This sets up a pattern of expected failure so when we decide to try it again, there is a part of us that expects it to fail.

So what do we do?

I’ll be addressing this in upcoming posts but to begin with, we need to start restructuring the brain. Most of the people I talk with about the Law of Attraction feel that it has failed them at one time or another.

Therefore, I want to put a challenge out there to my readers to join me in the Positivity Challenge.

I am not talking about only speaking in “positive” terms or being a Pollyanna. I’m suggesting that for one week, starting Wednesday, June 23^rd you become a more positive person and therefore draw more positive experiences into your life. We’ll do this in 3 ways.

1. Finding the positive—-In N.L.P. (Neuro Linguistic Programming) we use the term “Reframe”. A Reframe is a way of altering our perception of something. For instance, if someone were to lose their job they could reframe it by seeing that now they have the opportunity to do what they love. Or, you have to go to a business function and you really don’t want to go. You could see the experience as an opportunity to meet a new person, make a new friend or even just make someone’s day by being there.
2. Setting a positive expectation—-Expect to have positive things happen to you. The Law of Expectation is one of the most powerful laws in regards to manifesting by using the Law of Attraction. When we expect to receive, we do. When we expect to have a good time, we do. If we go around telling ourselves something terrible is going to happen, the odds of it happening go up. So instead, regardless of what is happening in your life, expect the best.
3. Co-create with Spirit (or whatever you believe to be the driving force of the universe)—-For one week, make it a point to take a moment every morning to ask your Higher Self, God, Spirit or the Force what your next step should be and when you get the answer or nudge, Do It!

These are very simple ways in which you can alter the neuro-pathway of a failure expectation. The only requirement is that you commit to it and you do it. So please join us this week and watch how your life can change.

Please sign in on the comments and let us all know how you’re doing and what is showing up in your life this week. You never know when what you write may be the one thing someone else needed to hear!

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Want to know how to restructure your neuro-pathways and change yourself and your life? Click here!

Wood et al. Positive Self-Statements: Power for Some, Peril for Others. Psychological Science, 2009; DOI: 10.1111/j.1467-9280.2009.02370.x

I’m going out on a limb by saying this but change is hard. We are all creatures of habit. To get ourselves to do something different can be equivalent to running a marathon without first training for it. Think how many times you’ve ever tried the “white knuckle” approach to something.  How successful were you?

The problem with changing our behaviors is not in our desire to do so. The problem is that we’re dealing with our two minds. The conscious mind, often called the rational mind and the unconscious mind or our emotional nature.

To change anything in our lives, these two minds have to be in agreement.

The conscious or rational mind is that part of us that is analytical and can delay gratification for long term goals or payoffs. The unconscious or emotional mind deals with pain and pleasure and is a pleasure seeking being.

The unconscious mind is interested in instant gratification. It wants things to be easy and quick. And it is the part of us that gets things done. The unconscious mind easily over rides the conscious mind when it comes to getting us to do things. The reason is that most of our behaviors are done unconsciously or without our awareness. We just do them without thinking about it.

We’ve actually created neuro pathways in the brain which run automatically whenever it’s time to do a specific behavior. You don’t have to think about how to overeat or brush your teeth.…you just do it or you could say your unconscious mind does it.

So every time you try and get your conscious mind to change a behavior through will power, you are attempting to override a neuro pathway that is practically set in stone. After a while, we actually get worn down by our own self supervision. How many times have you attempted to do something and just got fed up with the constant monitoring of your behavior? We can only do this so long before we are exhausted.

If you’ve ever tried to lose weight through dieting you know what I mean. Every morsel you put in your mouth you have to think about and weigh the pros and cons.

Another reason change is hard is because we keep changing our minds! One minute our rational mind thinks we want to lose the weight or stop drinking or get that report done and then we’re thinking about that piece of cake left in the kitchen or just one little drink won’t hurt.

So the problem isn’t that you are lazy or lack motivation. The problem is the battle between the conscious and unconscious mind. And to get these two in alignment, you have to restructure those neuro pathways.

Recently, scientists have discovered what they call Brain Plasticity where our brain cells or neurons are constantly making new pathways. This means that your brain can change! You can create the neuro pathways of your choice.

Change can then become quite easy because you’re creating on the unconscious level. So the next time you go to repeat an unwanted behavior, you find yourself doing the desired behavior.

This is part of the research that went into my development of the Neuro Pathway Restructuring™. I’ve used it with several different habitual behaviors such as smoking, alcoholism, drug addiction, bulimia, picking, OCD, PTSD, anxiety disorders and Tourette’s Syndrome.  I also use a form of it in many of my workshops to assist groups to let go of limiting beliefs they may have about themselves and their ability to be, do or have what they want. To check out the workshops, go to www.DebraFentress.com.

If you’re interested in learning more about Neuro Pathway Restructuring™ , please go to: www.NeuralPathwayRestructuring.com